We saw a dead sparrow, and a few thoughts on prayer

We went to breakfast on Saturday morning (the peach pecan muffin at Panera was outSTANDing) and Harper happened to spot a dead sparrow on the sidewalk. She asked if she might take it home and preserve it in some way,  and I demurred by saying that taxidermy is a complicated and exacting science that I was not ready to tackle just yet. Then I told her about the verse in the Bible (it is Matthew 10: 29--and yes, I had to look it up) where Jesus says not a sparrow falls to the ground apart from the will of God.  I love the idea that God in his omniscience is so interested in the small birds and other details that most of us miss. Although, imagine how sad it would be to know all of the details.

So we managed to go almost a week without the kids knowing about the bombing in Boston. Then our pastor mentioned it first thing in his sermon on Sunday. Harper whispered, "What happened?" So the husband jotted a little note on the picture she was drawing. I asked her (and Hudson) later that afternoon if they had any other questions about what they had heard. They were very interested in the fact that the FBI was involved. Hudson seemed to think that if Finn McMissile had been in Boston, the bombers might have been thwarted even sooner.

I was thinking about how, when one of these tragedies strikes, there is lots of bad theology everywhere. Most of it relates to prayer. I learned most of what I know about prayer when I worked at a children's hospital. I learned that sometimes children suffer and die, even when they are fervently prayed over. I learned that sometimes children get well, even if their parents haven't acknowledged that there might be Someone in charge of it all. I realized that we can't possibly pray against all of the crazy contingencies. That we can't predict the gene mutations and psychiatric quirks and bacterial infections gone awry.

We also can't predict the madmen. Which means we can't pray against their madmen evil.

I realized that when events like Boston (and Connecticut and Denver..) happen we should very quickly acknowledge that God is sovereign. That sometimes He intervenes. That sometimes He stays His hand. That we can never know to pray, "Dear Father, please keep my kids safe from a tortured kid with Aspergers and lots of ammunition today," or "Please, dear LORD protect me at the finish line from an explosion, " or, "while I watch this movie about Batman would you keep me safe from harm."

We can't possibly pray away the vagaries of individuals who are bent on destruction.

Which is why it bugs me when people who survive things like this start claiming a special mercy from the Almighty. I think the right response in these events is never ever, "Well, God was just watching over me," because it makes it seem like He wasn't "just" watching over that guy whose legs were blown away. A better (and more biblical) answer is always, "The LORD gives, and the LORD takes away. Blessed be the name of the LORD."

Does anyone remember a few years ago when that bridge collapsed near Minneapolis? I remember that for a week or so everyone was talking about bridges and specifications and things that we generally take for granted. This was something I already thought about every time I crossed over a bridge, especially one that crossed over water. How would I get out of the window? How would I get all three kids out of their carseats? How would I get the four of us safely to shore? So now, every time we cross over a bridge of any type, I pray something that goes like this:  "Sovereign God, in your Soveriegn will, could you sustain this bridge until we get across? Also after that? Because I don't want the people 4 cars back to fall into the Old and Lost River either and have to decide which of their kids to get out of the carseat first...." And usually by then we have crossed the Old and Lost Rivers and are on solid land and I whisper a "thank you for mercy, " and I try to remember to think of the families who lost someone they loved when that bridge in Minneapolis collapsed. Although sometimes one of the kids will then complain about someone looking at them or WHEN will we be HOME and I will want to say, "Don't you even UNDERSTAND what just happened? That bridge HELD and it could have collapsed?? GOD is merciful, and all you can do is COMPLAIN???"

So, I started this a week ago and never finished. I suppose we can never be finished pondering the mysteries of God.

The kids all passed their belt tests. Helena did so very daintily.

Also, that fever and rash I mentioned (that was actually two weeks ago today) was a touch of the streptococcus, diagnosed just today. Our very first kid antibiotic prescription. We made it almost 8 years. Not bad. Merciful, even.