and.....RELEASE

Harper has a superpower. She can, it turns out, drink her weight in fluids, and then hold her urine for upwards of two hours. Perhaps we can get her a guest spot on "Heroes". Here's how we discovered her gift. A couple of things happened during Monday's resounding potty training defeat that made me think she might have a urinary tract infection. So I called the doctor and asked how we'd go about diagnosing that. I knew what she'd say--they needed clean urine to test. Which meant that unless we were willing to subject her to an in and out catheterization (which, while not the MOST barbaric of medical procedures to perform on a child, easily makes the top 3), we would have to get her to pee in a cup. I guffawed and maybe even snorted a little on the phone. The doctor suggested we strip her down and put her in the bathtub. So. J. picked up the sterile specimen cup on his way home from teaching his class and I spent the morning following her around with her sippy cup. She drank at least 20 ounces. I put her, and her alarmingly distended belly, into the tub, and........nothing. We sang songs, we drank some more juice, we danced a little and... nothing. J. came in to check on us and realized we needed to be a little more aggressive. He got in there with her. He tickled, he sang, he lifted. She giggled, she sang, she jumped and demi-plied, and.....nothing. I am on my knees, dangled over the side of the bathtub, trying to keep the cup in the proximity of the anticipated flow. Forty-five minutes it took. But we got it, yes we did. A veritable geyser it was. J. took it to the doctor's office. No infection. So, we're thankful. And, sadly, sore. J's wrists hurt and my back was aching. And, after months of talking about how we put our peepee in the potty, Harper now understands that what we REALLY do is spend lots of time playing with Mommy and Daddy in the bathtub THEN we peepee in the green cup.