Thoughts on homeschooling, Part 2

Part 1 is here. I'll summarize: We like homeschooling because it means we are not busy and frantic, and someday when we are able, we can take trips off-season.

We started attending a homeschool co-op last week (Classical Conversations) that meets once a week. I realized that the kids were going to need new backpacks because the only ones they had are for camping and, nifty as they are, they aren't wide enough to accommodate their brand new ring binders. So, we set off on a backpack quest. Side note: many are the cheap, garish, licensed-character backpacks, few are the plain, good-quality ones. We ended up at the Gap because, hallelujah, a rain storm! and the Gap is inside of the Galleria where we could rejoice in the rain without having to be out IN it. We found some decent (and on sale) backpacks there and, as we were checking out, this conversation took place: (my actual words in plain font, my thoughts in italics)

Salesgirl: They aren't in school yet?
me: No, not yet!
Salesgirl: Why??
me: (This is when the husband has told me to just say "They are privately educated" and move on. However I feel compelled to really explain.) Actually, I homeschool them, so our schedule is pretty flexible. We are getting the backpacks for a co-op we are doing once a week.
Salesgirl: You mean you teach them at home? YOU are their teacher??
me: Yes!
Salesgirl: Do they listen to you? How do you get them to listen to you?
me: (See, that is precisely why so many public schools have gotten a reputation for being free, all-day babysitting. Because people like this think they have no authority over their own children, so they send them off to school where, it is assumed, their kids will magically obey another adult.)
Well, most of the time. You know, I think the reason lots of parents think their kids won't obey them is that they only see their kids in the mornings when everyone is sleepy and rushed, and then at the end of the day when everyone is exhausted after being at work or school all day. One of the good things about homeschooling is that I'm the one who gets to enjoy my kids when they are at their best.
Salesgirl: (looking so skeptical) Hm. So, how many hours does it take to teach them everything?
me: Well, they are only 2,4, and 6, so we can get everything done in an hour or two. Sometimes much less.
Salesgirl: (looks appalled) Wow, that's all?
me: (See, this is another fallacy. We think just because kids are in school 7-8 hours a day that they are, of course, learning, learning, learning the whole time, and that this is somehow virtuous or noble. Being busy does NOT equal being truly productive. It's much easier getting things done when it's just 3 kids as opposed to 20 or 30.
Salesgirl: Okay, well, have a good day.

Just for the record, I don't have a single friend who has chosen public or private school who thinks the way the Gap girl does. I'm certain that all of my friends who school differently than we do have come to their decisions after deep deliberation and extensive research. The truth is, I have yet to feel that homeschooling is 100% the right choice for us and our kids. (Does anyone EVER feel this certain about parenting choices??) I do believe that right now, it is our only logical choice. Our neighborhood public school is not great (definitely a large percentage of kids getting free, all-day babysitting). Quality private schools are too expensive. I'm so black-and-white that I berate myself about this. I feel like the only way my intentions towards homeschooling could be totally pure is if we were within walking distance of a fantastic public school, could also afford private, and yet STILL we chose to homeschool. The only thing I feel certain about (it's not teaching methodology or curriculum) is that at this age, 35-40 hours a week is a tremendous amount of time to allow adults I do not know, and children I do not know, to influence my kids. If I went back to work, we could probably afford private school. But, that just seems silly to me. I would be getting paid to teach other kids, while I paid someone else to teach mine. Counter-intuitive, right?? And, NO, I do not think that just because someone went to college and got a degree in teaching means they have some Magical Expertise that I can't possible acquire. You know how I can know this? I AM someone who went to college and got certified to teach. And that is NOT why I feel qualified to teach my kids at home.

So, to conclude, dear Gap girl: No, my kids do not always mind me, and when they do not, I try to make the consequence swift and meaningful. Yes, we only "do school" a little portion of each day, but we are, hopefully, always learning. I am, most of the time, grateful for the opportunity to be with them all day, every day. In such a quick time, it will not be so, and it is my earnest prayer that I will have few regrets.